It's a funny place, this new world I live in. I think England may have felt more familiar than working for the government; at least they spoke English there. It's not nearly as scary as I presumed it would be, but it is new and different, and I am still walking on shaky legs. Shaky, but proud - tentative and slow, but moving forward. The last few weeks have opened my eyes to the adult world, to [more of] what goes on behind the professional facade, to the humanity of my coworkers and supervisors, as well as to their wisdom. It is surprisingly less intimidating, and I realize it is because I am really getting acquainted with myself. When I went to Europe I had no idea what was to become of me; I knew that my independence would be tested, and that I would either gain confidence or come home and stay tucked away in Tennessee for the rest of my life. Thankfully I grew - to love Europe, to love travel, to love challenge, to embrace "hard", "scary", "new". Which has further spurred me on in the other terrifying encounters I have in this fast world where the crosswalk character and ensuing cars wait for no man, old or young, and the outdoors are only experienced and enjoyed by a select few professionals who find the time. I find joy in the silliest idiosyncrasies of this working life...the way my heels tap on the tile floor walking up to my office; that this sound does not depend on how perky or motivated I feel - it sounds important no matter what, though more important the quicker the pace....How the receptionist differentiates between the two Stephanies in the office by calling me Lily on a regular basis. At this point, I don't think she knows my real name anymore....The way the frozen yogurt store downstairs plays a movie every day that reaches into my long-term, dusty memory and pulls out a smile. Today's was Big. Yesterday was the old Charlie and the Chocolate Factory....How the man at the top of the metro escalator announces all the biggest news stories while he passes out his papers...How the milk steamer hisses as I pass Starbucks, and the coffee scents follow me down the hall...How my chair is comfy enough to sit curled up on my feet all day long...
As a side note before I get back to work, let me just say that even though I voted today, and I like who I voted for, the sweetest part of the whole experience was standing with my husband at 7 in the morning, jacketed arm in jacketed arm, chatting before we went our separate ways for the day. I think voting is mostly a great excuse to stand in line for inordinate amounts of time with someone you care about and less about the names you circle on your ballot. Suffice all that to say, we're going to be ok, Mitt or Barack, and in 4 years, this all happens again. The only thing I'll do differently when I vote in 2016 is bring coffee.
